Funny retirement quotes are a fantastic way to make the retiree in your life feel recognized and appreciated.
Whether you’re looking for retirement quotes for coworkers or for a friend, these quotes are perfect for writing in a message or card.
Funny Retirement Quotes
- The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.
~ Abe Lemons - The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.
~ Author Unknown - You have to put off being young until you can retire.
~ Author Unknown - A retired husband is often a wife’s full-time job.
~ Ella Harris - I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. So I do it three or four times a day.
~ Gene Perret - My retirement plan is to get thrown into a minimum-security prison in Hawaii.
~ Julius Sharpe - What do you call a person who is happy on a Monday? Retired.
~ Unknown - Retirement is like a long vacation in Las Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money.
~ Jonathan Clements - Retirement: It’s nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.
~ Gene Perret
Inspirational Retirement Quotes
- Often, when you think you’re at the end of something, you’re at the beginning of something else.
~ Fred Rogers - And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.
~ Abraham Lincoln - You are never too old to set a new goal or dream a new dream.
~ C.S. Lewis - Retirement is a blank sheet of paper. It is a chance to redesign your life into something new and different.
~ Patrick Foley - I see retirement as just another of these reinventions, another chance to do new things and be a new version of myself.
~ Walt Mossberg - Living each day as if it were your last doesn’t mean it’s your last day of retirement on a remote island. It means to live fully, authentically, and spontaneously, with nothing being held back.
- ~ Jack Canfield
- Retirement gives you the time literally to recreate yourself through a sport, game or hobby that you always wanted to try or that you haven’t done in years.
- ~ Steven Price
- Life is your artwork. Create it! No one else can do it for you. You create it by seeing life and living it to its fullest.
- ~ Max Ehrmann
- The key to retirement is to find joy in the little things.
- ~ Susan Miller
- Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.
- ~ Lyrics from Closing Time by Semisonic